Better now thanks ;)

So my boss made some wise crack about me having a 4 day holiday weekend, to which I pointed out that I was in the office for over an hour on Friday and over 4 hours on Sunday… he said her knew… but it still annoyed me.

F - You

So on lunch I am waiting at the barber to get my hair cut and I see in a magazine one of those free trial cards. So I ripped it out, and then I went through every magazine in the shop looking for subscription cards and trial cards. I got back to the office with over 50 of them, after I filtered them down to “try 1 issue free” or “Cancel any time at no charge”  I proceeded to fill them all out with my bosses information.

To: Mr D-Bag

So now he should be getting 19 different magazines mailed to his house next month. If he calls and cancels them then it won’t cost him a cent...

if he does not…

well that’s his problem…

Awe .. wait for it... Some

Ya, I know.

What was that?

Good weekend!

I am up to season 3 of Dr Who and I just realized I am supposed to be watching the Torchwood series right now… Dam the BBC and there blending of the two shows! But it’s all good, I like the stories they use. It is funny that the Brits sci-fi tends to lean a little more towards the “Horror” genre then American sci-fi does. 

I used the Dr as my relaxation time this weekend... between trips to the pool and shopping with my wife… I spent over 3 hours each day this long weekend in the pool with the kids and I am TIRED! I was a little sad yesterday as most of the girls at the pool were your standard suburban house wives and not the hotties I was hoping for. 

To much of THIS

 

Not enough of this

I made it another whole weekend with out a smoke… My last drag was late in the night of May 13^th (possibly technically may 14^th) so it has been 17 days. Smoke free.

2 WEEKS
    * Circulation improves
    * Walking becomes easier
    * Lung function increases up to 30 percent

Blow me indeed!

And for todays random thought:

When we were kids playing our Nintendos and the game wouldn't work we pulled it out and blew into the cartridge... then we tried it again... 

How did every kid int he world know how to do that? There was no internet or email, no youtube videos or FAQs, we didn't text our friends or watch G4tv... But we all did the same thing...

Today's kids are WEAK!

The quiet moments.

The good news is that I survived last night with out a smoke, I generally attribute most of that to the fact that I was floating in a pool all night, and smoking was always hard when you were soaking wet. 

I did not say impossible just not easy.

I am starting to see a pattern in my cravings; When I get in the car to go some where alone, when I stand up after dinner, when I sit down to relax but before I pick a show or open a book, or at night when I am turning the TV and lights off and locking up the house. Those little seconds of time where I have nothing going on and have to make a decision about what to do… that’s when “Have a smoke” still pops into my head as an option…

Mercurio from Captain's memoirs mentioned that I might have to change the name of my blog soon but I don’t think so. As time goes by I am realizing how easy it would be to grab a pack of smokes and fall right back into my bad habbits, and I don’t like it. So you are going to be stuck with me using you as my personal support group for quite some time!

I cant offer much in payment but I do hope you enjoy these:

I have nothing to say here.... 

And for my two favorte balls of raging hormones Jessica and Lola

One for the girls in the room.

Have a great weekend and i'll see you all Tuesday!

Weekends are harder...

I spent the whole afternoon at the pool today, we had a community event for opening day. Can I just say that there is nothing better then lounging back and watching all the pretty girls walk by in their little ity bity bikinis!

Ok maybe not THIS small!

It was nice to get some sun on my pasty white body, and the lifeguard was chatting me up, and she looked dam good in her little 2 piece life guard outfit.

Exactly like this but blond...

I didn’t have a single smoke craving at the pool all day but when I got home for dinner and to relax for a bit I did want one. But it went away before I even had time to get on and write it down  ;)
Yay me!
But there is alcohol tonight so I hope I can stay strong. 

Good times.

Just some things from my day so far... 

We had a tornado touch down about 5 miles from my house last night... luckily I live in the ‘burbs so 5 miles away was farm country. Lots of wind damage around here but nothing serious. I did have to stop at work this morning and help reset the phone systems. So I get to tack that onto my next review  ;)

Money Money Money!

  

I went to the gym today, I have defiantly lost a lot of what I had last year in mussel but I was able to run a mile on the treadmill and that was new for this recently ex-smoker  ;)

You can almost see his lung coming out...

But the great news is that there was a girl working out on a treadmill just in front of me, she was really running hard and when she tried to adjust the strap on her tank top...  it broke and she had a wardrobe malfunction!

Kinda like this... 

 Best day at the gym EVER….

Day 38

The good news is that I really think I can do this no smoking thing… it actually is getting easier every day!

It is a short week here for me, I took a vacation day tomorrow to attend my kids graduation from preschool. So a 4 day work week, a 4 day weekend and another 4 day work week. I can get used to this  ;)

No work for me!

I have a full day planed for Saturday, first the farmers market, then a few hours at the pool, home for lunch and then back to the pool for an ice cream social, followed by a nap. It is going to be a tough day I tell you what!

Not my wife.

So what are YOUR plans for the weekend?

Casting...

I was watching a baseball movie last night with my kids and I realized that they really have no criteria for casting players in baseball movies. Tim Robbins as a pitcher in Bull Durham, or Major league where I am SURE several people that had to go through rehab after pretending to have played a game of baseball…

Up your butt, Jobu

And that got me to thinking about other “sports” movies that had bad casting, Woody from cheers as a basketball phenom? Michael J Fox as a basketball star in Teen Wolf? (ok not a sports movie but still funny!)

We love him as long as he plays good ball!

 And then I realized its not JUST baseball, they do it to football also! Scott Bakula in Necessary Roughness, Keanu Reeves in The Replacements, Daemon Waynes in the last boy scout…

Best part of that movie!

I hope they never make a movie about swimsuit competitions, we would end up with America Ferrera in the lead.

America Ferrera

... Also America Ferrera!

NOT America Ferrera!

Day 37

A question I have been asked several times lately is whether blogging about not smoking is making me think about the fact that I am not smoking…. And if all this thinking about not smoking is making me want to smoke!

Short answer is NO. (If you don’t care then skip to the section after the video)

Longer answer is that when I was smoking I thought about smokeing and how I should quit 20 – 40 times a day, I couldn’t go an hour without one of those two thoughts running through my head. “I should go get a smoke” or “I need to quit smoking” or “I only have 4 smokes left, can I make it till I get out at 5pm?” or “Maybe I can quit after this next holiday”… as I look at it now it was non stop! This blog is a personal retrospective on the things that are different and a reaffirmation of all of the changes for the better going on in my life right now… 

Could I have spent over an hour messing with my bosses pens the other day if I still smoked… Probably not, because I would have stopped to have a smoke instead of getting his pens. Could I have made it through the whole hour long cardio class last night if I was still smoking… I probably would have coughed up a lung! Would I have noticed the oddly hot tomboyish girls that work at my home depot… Nope I would have rushed out to my car to have a smoke.  So I couldn’t be happier everyday spending a few minutes typing up about all of the things I can do now that my mind is not tied up stressing about my next nicotine fix.

Ok enough of all of that introspective shit…

Hooters!

Juggs!

A nice pair!

Boobies!... Wait... that's not right

Boobies!... Awww WTF!

Boobies!  SOB, your not even trying anymore.

 .....

For some reason my butt hurts.

So that class last night was kind of awesome. The music was a mix of dance music that I knew almost every song of. About 60 people were in the class, and most6 of the seamed to know the routines pretty well already so they must go all the time… and for a bonus there were a LOT of hot girls in the class. The only bad part is that the instructor pulled the 3 of us guys up to the front to dance to “You should put a ring on it” … it was not pretty …   

I also watched two more episodes of Doctor Who on Netflix last night, and I figured out my issue with the girl, her big cow eyes make her look so young, she is like an artists rendition of what a pretty young British girl should look like… Ill bet by season 2 she is way hotter then in the first 4 episodes.

I did fine all night until right before bed,  I still want that last smoke of the day… I worry that that craving might never go away ;(

But, its all good, I shall keep thinking of dancing with hot sweaty women and the cravings shall pass. 

Day 36

So today on lunch I grabbed some fast food and stopped at the gas station.
While this may not seam like much to you, for me it was a two or three time a week ritual I went though until recently... It used to be that I needed to run to the gas station to buy smokes, so I would stop on the way back from lunch. Today I just needed some soda, but standing in that line, I tell you what, it was all I could do not to ask for a pack...

No smoke for me!

But I did not falter; I survived that little battle and got back to my car with just the soda I went in for (and a pack of M&Ms). But man it totally rattled me all afternoon. I thought of smoking more today then I did even when I WAS smoking.

On top of that tonight is my first group fitness class at the gym. Apparently there will be hip hop music that I will be told how to dance to... this should end poorly for everyone involved.

Ya, kinda like this...

But it is what I have to do if I don't want to get fatter!

The good news is that I have seen some of the girls in the class...

She may or may not be in the class...

The Doctor.

So last night I finally broke down and started watching Doctor Who. I am starting with the 2005. I hope they can keep up the humor and pace the first two episodes set. I cant decide if the girl Rose is hot or not…

 

I actually have a lot to get done at work today but there is a problem...

I never get any work done

Sooo ya, ill just leave this here and come back later.

Ahhh this is a good day.

First, I didn’t even think about having a smoke today until I started writing this post (yay!) and I am sure the craving will be gone before I finish typing ;)

Second and most importantly, I AM WINNING!

My dastardly plan unfolds before my very eyes:

I was sitting in the customer service offices when my boss walked in to talk to one of the ladies up there and I noticed that he had in his hand a pen, not just any pen but one of the ones from his pen jar... (For background please read this) So I waited and watched… and what to my wondering eyes should appear but him trying to write a note and the pen dying mid sentence!!! AWESOME! It was all I could do not to have a huge dopey grin on my face. But as I was walking away I heard him say “That’s the 2^nd pen that died on me today…” If my back wasn’t to him he would have seen my face light up like a Christmas tree in one of that sappy lifetime movies!

Ya, all that open flame is real safe...

Third, Our secretary made fresh cookies for us today! Chocolate chip toll house.

You see folks, this is all it takes to make me happy, the little things… 

And sometimes big things....

Day 35

I have noticed that I am starting to do things differently. Or more specifically I am thinking differently and therefore reacting differently... Ya, that didn’t make any sense, let me give an example. It used to be that I was “done” shopping in a store when my desire to go out and have a smoke came together with my having found everything I needed purchase. This meant I didn’t do a lot of wandering around stores or malls because once I had found what I needed it didn’t take long to want to head out for a smoke. This also pushed through to my check out procedures, standing there with in sight of my car and my next smoke was like walking into the bathroom and seeing all of the toilets in use… you CAN hold it, you just don’t WANT to.

Look at the pain in his eyes...

Well this weekend I had some home improvement projects I wanted to get done so I headed out to ye old Home Depot. Me and my son wandered around the store for a solid hour, looking at things talking about colors and he even helped me pick out a new lawnmower. We took our time at check out and even chatted with the lady employees. And that’s when it hit me… Home depot chicks are kinda hot.

Ok not THIS HOT!

I think it might be a version of the cheerleader effect, but watching good looking women do manual labor, kind sexy. There were two girls rearranging a pallet of tiles on display near the check out, and a girl helping a man lift sheet of plywood into his truck, and a girl bringing those large flatbed carts back into the store…  And there it, was… I had time to slow down and look around rather then just rush back to my car for a smoke… Good times!

More on the Cheerleader Effect:

Is that Penny!?

Is there a Trojan man joke that hasn't been made?

The forgot the redhead.

 See, look at these girls INDIVIDUALLY and the whole is greater then the sum of the parts! AKA, the cheerleader effect.